LM 4.3 — Anochi, Part 3 of 3 · תורה ד׳

Okay, recording today because of scheduling issues, and also I'm a little congested so I might speak a little bit slower, which might be better or worse. We are, we stopped off last time in the middle of אות ט, a little bit before we start, we go into Rabba bar bar Chana in אות י, so just to bring us forward to where we were holding, we started off the piece and said that a person can get to a place where they're מעין עולם הבא if they are able to internalize that everything is for the good.

And we said how does a person get there? If they're able to elevate מלכות, to bring מלכות back to its שורש, because מלכות, which is the גילוי of רצון השם in the עולם העשיה, it's the way that the world that we are in reflects back and aligns itself in a way that's manifest with רצון השם, is, is now that מלכות or the שכינה is in גלות, so where we look around, it doesn't necessarily always appear to reflect, to reflect רצון השם. And we said that how does one elevate מלכות, and these things were fleshed out in the other שיעורים, we said that וידוי in front of a תלמיד חכם through spoken דיבור is a way to get there, and we will, we'll mention that again

in a second. When a person knows that everything is for the best, this becomes in a בחינה of דעת, of אחדות, of unity, of bringing חסד and גבורה together, השם אחד ושמו אחד, where everything is, is, is really coming together. One of the examples that we gave is when a person has an organization or a society, a community, whatever it is, where the objective is totally to give and do חסד, so as the organization runs itself, sometimes there will be the arm of that organization whose job is חסד and giving, and then by, by definition, in order to have it go forward, there will also have to be those elements which are either the disciplinary committee or the budget committee or the vetting committee in

order to know how to do it. As a person looks from down looking up, there are going to be certain elements that seem to be חסד, seem to be in a notion of giving, and there are going to be certain things that seem to be more withholding and more restrictive, and especially if some of them become distorted and they're not even accomplishing its purpose, they can even take a left turn and become רע. But if a person is able to see above it and tap into the real purpose and understand how everything is really working together, so then a person can realize ultimately that השם אחד ושמו אחד, that as a person, you know, whether if you like sports analogies, that when the person is

pushing you harder, all of these things are really coming together in order to facilitate something going forward and becoming productive, and Hakadosh Baruch Hu's ultimate purpose, עולם חסד יבנה, is for our benefit. How does וידוי work? So we said in אות ה that, that עבירות, that sins blemish the מלכות and that they are etched into the bones, and where do they go, they actually form these צירופי אותיות, these negative letter combinations, and וידוי is able to take, to, to take off these negative צירופי אותיות and actually build them back up into a positive way.

Why specifically does the וידוי have to be by a תלמיד חכם? So we said in אות ו that the source of מלכות is אש and Torah is called אש and a talmid chacham is a living Torah, and that when a person does this vidui by a talmid chacham and he says it in spoken word, and spoken word is also in a bechinah of מלכות, he's able to, to attach to the source of מלכות and bring מלכות back to its שורש. So we discussed the necessity of vidui in front of a talmid chacham, but what, what's the mechanism?

That a talmid chacham, and we're going to speak more about that now as we move forward, is that by virtue of his ענווה, his, his humility, a tzaddik, a talmid chacham is able to elevate מלכות back to the אין and actually be נכלל in אין and lose his, his own independent identity in a certain sense and, and become absorbed into רצון השם. So again, the way that we, we perceive down here, מלכות should really be a complete expression and flow coming down from רצון השם. We don't always see that from where we stand, but when a person is able to take it back to the שורש and, and understand that everything is בעצם an expression of רצון השם, and if anything, the reason that things

don't seem to be that way is because הקדוש ברוך הוא gave us the opportunity for avodah, and if we're not doing what we're supposed to be doing, so sometimes things get distorted, but we'll see that our actions and our teshuvah actually affect things that are much greater than us as well. However, we did see also in אות ח that vidui is actually the step three in a three-step process for teshuvah, because the way that we make ourself into a כלי and that we remove the negative, the negative elements that are holding us back are by number one, attaching ourself to a tzaddik or being רואה a tzaddik, being מתקשר, appreciating being מתקשר yourself to a tzaddik, and number two, also by giving tzedakah to a

tzaddik, which we fleshed out last time and we'll speak out a little bit more. And once a person is able to use this to take off the four general categories, categories of מדות, so then a person is able to then move forward and say vidui in front of a tzaddik where, where the tzaddik can help flesh out the direction that a person's avodah should take in terms of his שורש נשמה and his strengths and weaknesses, a person is able to say vidui, which has the spiritual component that we discussed in terms of taking off the negative צירופי אותיות, but also in terms of in terms of getting direction.

So we we spoke about this in the context of of a ma'amar Chazal, of a Gemara that was from Sotah. That was אות ח, and in ט we further said that בכל פעם שבא אצל תלמיד חכם מספר לפניו כל לבו. We explored more this attachment to the tzadik, and that tzadik or talmid chacham was בבחינת משה, עניו מכל אדם, who is a בחינה of ayin, of being able to have hitbatlut, and being niklal in the source, we spoke more about that. So carrying forward into where we are holding right now, which is in the middle of ט, כל זה, this idea that Moshe Rabbeinu, that who is the ultimate expression of the בחינה of a talmid chacham or a tzadik, that Moshe was able to

be niklal in the Ein Sof, that he was totally מבטל עצמו, היה במותו. So this that we discussed last time is talking about by by Moshe's petirah, that after his mot, that he was buried מול בית פעור, אבל בוודאי גם בחייו היה לו התפשטות הגשמיות. Certainly, while Moshe was alive also, he also was able to have התפשטות הגשמיות to shed his his his gashmiyut, his corporality or whatever the word is. And the Likutei Halachot brings, he says that that when a person has a total hitbatlut to הקדוש ברוך הוא, so no matter who one is, he doesn't have the kelim, he doesn't have the capacity.

A keli has to be able to hold whatever the or is. So if a person has his hitbatlut into the Ein Sof, then, by definition, a person doesn't have the kelim, his mind or whatever it is, his da'at does not have the kelim to be able to hold the Ein Sof. But what ends up happening is that there's a klal in ruchniyut that where there's or in a certain place and it leaves, it's not like when we have it, we turn the lights on, we shut it off.

It leaves what in our language is going to be called a reshimu. It leaves an imprint. And this reshimu is something that if a person is able to rectify his kelim and ready his da'at through teshuvah, and as we're discussing, a person will be able to benefit and hold this רשימו, this what's left over. So והיה מדבק את עצמו באור אין סוף. So Moshe Rabbeinu, the צדיק is able to be מדבק himself with the אור אין סוף, אבל ההתפשטות היה בבחינת החיות רצוא ושוב. But this idea of being able to come away from gashmiyut is actually in the בחינה of רצוא ושוב.

רצוא ושוב is a language that is coming off of it's coming off of a pasuk. Gemara Chagigah discusses it, but it's coming off of a pasuk in Yechezkel. It's talking about a flame that like the the licks of a flame jump up and back. We actually mentioned from a mussar point of view that Rav Shimshon Pinkus uses this uses this idea when he says a person thinks that, "If I'm only going to be, you know, 10% I'm good 10% of the time, so what's the point? That means that I'm 90% bad." And Rav Pinkus says, "No, the pasuk talks about והחיות רצוא ושוב, that life works in flashes of lightning.

If I'm good 10% of the time, it doesn't mean I'm 10% good. It means I'm 100% good 10% of the time. When Hakadosh Baruch Hu goes back and he looks at the frames of his of his life like one of those old flip books and he looks back at every frame of this person's life, he's going to knock it out of the park in 10% of those frames. So there is 100% a point when a person has a frame of avodah that all of a sudden it's רצוא ושוב, when you can go and jump up and be 100% good, so you can take that with you." But back to our text, he says, והחיות רצוא ושוב, ר׳ נתן actually explains that a person who's going

to be מתבטל to the אין סוף, the real measure of success is not even seen A person can always jump up. Really our avodah takes place in the עולם העשיה, which is where we're going to see. Hakadosh Baruch Hu had all of his angels. What Hakadosh Baruch Hu wanted is that avodah should take place davka in the עולם העשיה, דווקא where there's מלכות, where there's התגלות, and there can only be a revelation of something where there's, so to speak, an other, אין מלך בלא עם. It's only over here where we are physical beings, where we're not totally in a general sense התבטלות, where we we can we're batel to to the אין סוף, where we can jump up and have these revelations, but we have

to bring it back home. And depending what we bring back home with us, we're able to manifest רצון השם. That's where be'etzem the money is, that's where the avodah is. And Rav Natan says that the real measure of success is actually seen in the שוב. It's when he comes back down to earth. The example that he gives is planting a kernel of grain. When the when the grain is planted, which is actually one of the משלים that you see תחיית המתים, you can have a moth turn into a butterfly, a grain seed turn into grain, it exists in a certain status, and then it becomes totally mush, totally negated, it becomes worse than it was to begin with, but when it comes back, it comes

back even than it was better even than it was in its initial state, it comes back even in an enhanced form of life. So תחיית המתים we don't relate to, but over here these are things that in our world, a moth that becomes mush in the cocoon or whatever it is and becomes a butterfly, or a seed that becomes mush and then grows back as a flower, you see something go through this process, and Rav Natan says that in order if in Likutei Halachos in order for this kernel to produce, first it becomes בטל, it becomes totally absorbed in the earth, once it loses its identity and it all but disappears, it takes root, and when it grows back after that התבטלות, it comes back

even in an enhanced state, and we go through this cycle of רצוא ושוב of ביטול, and then coming back, and if you can take back that רשימו with you, you come back even in an enhanced state. Vayter, so he says הקדוש ברוך הוא בעצם wants our avodah as רצוא ושוב, not that we're going to be בטל לגמרי, כי הקדוש ברוך הוא רוצה בעבודתנו. What הקדוש ברוך הוא wants is בעצם our עבודה, כמו שכתוב in Mussaf of Yom Kippur, ואוית תהילה. What does הקדוש ברוך הוא have, as it were?

ואוית is לשון like תאוה, is לשון of ואוית, a desire, הקדוש ברוך הוא wants תהילה, תפילה, He wants praise מגבשי עפר, from clumps of dust, מכרוצי חומר. It seems that on a certain sense we're not holding as high in a spiritual sense as angels, but our our spiritual capacity for growth where the avodah is of being able to move and get closer to הקדוש ברוך הוא and bring ourselves closer and raise the world with us, that's something that we can do and angels can't do. And in that sense, as the Nefesh HaChaim discusses, we're on a higher level than malachim.

הקדוש ברוך הוא wants that the avodah should be בעצם ושוב, when we come back to ourselves, ובשביל זה צריך שלא ישאר כן. So we can't stay in a in in a state of התבטלות where we don't have our own identity, where we don't have any of our own physicality and our own drives, because then there's no avodah. The whole point of the world is that we should have bechirah, that it that it shouldn't be נהמא דכיסופא, that הקדוש ברוך הוא should give us a makom of avodah to earn our keep, and that takes place where we are.

אלא עד עת שיבוא הקדוש ברוך הוא בעצמו ויטול נשמתו, that's only where this התבטלות is going to be is after our opportunity for life. וזה, and this idea that we're constantly in this in this cycle of רצוא ושוב, שאנו רואים שלפעמים נתלהב אדם בתוך התפילה, we'll see that a person sometimes will become totally inspired by תפילה, ואומר כמה תיבות בהתלהבות גדול, and a person will be engaged in something that's seems to be an incredibly uplifting experience. And we have to ask, so where where does this come from?

Why דווקא by tefillah? And why it seems to be that it drops off, we don't seem to be holding there naturally that we're always in that state, but all of a sudden a person seems to jump up a level and have a tremendous התלהבות, and then it drops back off. זה בחמלת ה' עליו. This is really bringing in a פסוק, בחמלת ה' עליו, by It's a pasuk that talks about when Lot got saved, and it says that this הצלה was בחמלת ה' עליו, that he didn't deserve it, it was coming really from the זכות of Avraham.

But Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives this in His חמלה, שנפתח לו אור אין סוף והאיר לו. Hakadosh Baruch Hu is giving us because of our התקשרות to a צדיק, because of our וידוי, because of all these steps that we're taking that we're discussing, Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives us this outpouring of of of shefa so that we're able to benefit from a point in time, although Rav Natan adds in Torat Natan, interestingly, he says a person has to also daven to Hakadosh Baruch Hu that he shouldn't, in a certain sense, outrun his capabilities, because a person does have to create that bridge for avodah, otherwise, it would be דהיינו you tell somebody who's not mature enough to to appreciate a certain concept.

First of all, it's going to become at at worst, or at best rather, the person is not going to appreciate what you're saying, and when you later on when he is mature enough, you're not even going to be able to wow him and and give him a certain concept because he's already heard it, he heard it through the eyes of a of a 10-year-old, a 15-year-old, whatever the case may be, and now when you tell it to him again, he would have to totally erase what he heard the first time to want of any benefit.

And at worst, it'll become totally distorted through his eyes the first time, not just that he didn't appreciate and became desensitized to the idea, it's going to become worse. So if a person outruns his own capabilities, he tries to go too high, too fast, he's going to end up stumbling later on, and he won't even be able to have the כלים to absorb that רשימו, that what was left over from the from this spiritual experience, he's not even going to be able to hold it later on.

So it has to become cycled so that he's able to be exposed, he won't be able to stay there, but he's growing in his כלים so that he can still benefit from the cycle and keep on growing closer and closer. וכשרואה אדם התנוצצות הזאת, when a person sees this radiance, this idea that he has during תפילה, אף על גב דאיהו לא חזי, even if he's not sensitive to the אור specifically, מזליה חזי, but there's something inside of him, his mazal, as it were, that is sensitive, תכף נתלהב נשמתו בדביקות גדול, he has the shefa from Hakadosh Baruch Hu, and immediately he feels this sense of deveikut, this sense of closeness to הקדוש ברוך הוא, לדבק את עצמו באור אין סוף, to be מבטל himself, to

nullify himself within רצון ה', where he doesn't have any of his own independence, עשה רצונך כרצונו, וכש or all of a sudden he's, you know, a person has all of his, whether it's career ambitions ambitions, whether it's other drives, and for for a moment in time if you would ask him what he literally wants, his own רצון, his own רצון is just to be נכלל in, in, in אין סופיות, his own רצון is ratzon Hashem. וכאשר התגלות, which this is in our terms, וכאשר התגלות אין סוף, and to the extent that there's a gilui that HaKadosh Baruch Hu gives him a גילוי, לפי מנין התיבות שנפתחו והתנוצצו, in line with the davenen and the letters that are opening up that he's expressing that he has

this radiance. כל אלו התיבות אומר בדביקות גדול, he's going to say this davenen with a tremendous דביקות, ובמסירות נפשו ובביטול כוחותיו, and with mesirut nefesh, and he's going to be mevatel his kochot. ובשעה שנתבטל לגבי אין סוף, and at this time that he is mevatel himself legabei the Ein Sof, which for our purposes we're using for now as the source as as in line with HaKadosh Baruch Hu, but everything there we can't even speak really of HaKadosh Baruch Hu, who's infinite, who we can't even have any point of a reference, but for our purposes it's it's the ultimate source of ratzon.

אזי הוא בבחינת ולא ידע איש, שאפילו הוא בעצמו אינו יודע מעצמו, that it says the pasuk in Devarim that we brought earlier by the קבורה of Moshe, it says ולא ידע איש. Even Moshe, because of this deveikut, that a person totally loses his own independent identity בכלל, so at that point he becomes in this בחינה of ולא ידע איש, that he doesn't even have his own daat, that it's totally absorbed in the ratzon Hashem, in in אין סופיות. אבל זאת הבחינה צריך להיות רצוא ושוב. But this idea is not something that is that that that is static, and it's not something that's that's a stable place for him to be as a person.

כדי שיתקיים אישיותו, he has to come back in order The כתב יד actually says כדי שיתקיים נשמתו בו. A person can't exist in that state. He has to keep his his his his identity or he has to keep his functionality as a person, because that's really where ratzon Hashem is. That's really HaKadosh Baruch Hu wants from what we said, ואביסתילמי, מה מה what was the lashon? From קרוצי חומר, מגושי עפר מקרוצי חומר, that's what this whole system is designed, adam is at the center of the system.

נמצא, כשהוא בבחינת ושוב, when he comes back, אזי צריך להראות גם לדעתו, he discloses, as it were, to his own daat, which happens mimela because the רשימו is left over. The da'at, his his his human capability or however you want to define da'at, but his his capacity as da'at now has to have this what's left over, something that, even though he can't stay in the state of being where he was in this tremendous דביקות and התלהבות, there needs to be a bridge to his da'at. כי מתחילה, בשעת דביקות, while he was in the state of דביקות, הנה נתבטל הדעת.

He didn't even have his own capacity, he didn't even have his own da'at. It was something that transcended his da'at because even da'at, as much as a person's intellect is not limited by time and place, person can think different idea, you can imagine something that happened lemashal 20 years ago right now, you could think two things at the same time, a person's da'at is not If you would have a file cabinet in your head, it would be bigger than 57 rooms, 1,000 rooms, how would it live inside your head?

Da'at is not limited by מקום וזמן, and nevertheless, we say that da'at but the אין סופיות is more than the capacity for da'at. So at that point his da'at was batel, כמו שכתוב ולא ידע איש. וכששב בבחינת ושוב, but when he comes back, ששב either לאישיותו, אז שב לדעתו. So now he comes back to his own da'at, and now there's going to be this רשימו, this imprint, as it were, left over from his experience of התלהבות and דביקות, and that's going to build up, and his כלי will expand.

And if a person cycles, each time he'll go higher, higher and higher, peaks and valleys, but he'll be growing constantly more, that he's going to have this experience of התבטלות, and then come back to himself. And a tzadik has this this ultimate experience of התבטלות, and that's what we were discussing, that as a person attaches himself to the tzadik, so the tzadik can bring this person up to the state of התבטלות, to the state where the where the מלכות, which is feet on the ground, the עולם העשיה, what's reflecting down here, is really נכלל into its שורש, and that's where we come back to בחינה of השם אחד ושמו אחד, which is how we started the piece, where there is no din and rachamim, we're

really בעצם everything is rachamim, because we're able to tap into everything as הטוב והמטיב, that everything is is coming from its source. וכששב לדעתו, אז הוא יודע אחדות האין סוף וטובו, and when a person comes back, now that he has this idea, this concept of this אחדות of אין סוף, of the שורש of what we see that everything is really coming להיטיב to to the creations, ואז אין חילוק בין השם לאלוקים, בין מידת הדין למידת רחמים, which we were talking about in אות ג, כי באין סוף אין שייך חס ושלום, he says חס ושלום because, again, in אין סוף we we we talk about because we have a point of reference.

You can't even talk about any There's no such thing as a distinction in something that's אין סופיות, that's in if something that's infinite. Anytime that you can compare A to B, that means A has limitations and B has limitations. The idea of having, of taking, to even discussing two different things, even if you say that they end up being unified, you can't even talk about it in the אין סופיות. So this is from our perspective that we're relating up, but he says חס ושלום, כי באין סוף אין שייך חס ושלום שינוי רצון, there's no distinctions in anything, כי השינויים אינם אלא בשינוי התמונות.

It's only in the מלכות, in the, we said that the letters, דיבור also, spoken speech, things that are broken up, that they're articulated, that they're manifest. The letters are building blocks of the בריאה. The Gemara in Shabbos talks about the different in אלף בית. These are in מלכות. That's where we see שינוי, that we see differences that are that are manifested. And I think we mentioned last week that if HaKadosh Baruch Hu created, for instance, you know, all, I think Rav Avigdor Miller says this, all apples green, that wouldn't show that there's unity in HaKadosh Baruch Hu.

That would show that HaKadosh Baruch Hu, חס ושלום to say, is a green apple machine. It's really when everything is differentiated, and all of a sudden a person takes a step back and says that it's all נכלל in one רצון. It's all coming to serve the same purpose, that at its שורש that there's no differences, and everything, as different as it seems, is really an expression of the same thing. That's where you see, you you can relate to a יחוד at the שורש. אבל על ידי הדבקות של אדם באין סוף, ששם אין שינוי רצון, כי שם רצון פשוט.

But through דבקות, the person has דבקות at the at the in the אין סוף, at the שורש, where there is no שינוי in רצון, where everything is really a a singular רצון for להיטיב עם הבריאות, right? And it's only it's only us that we see דין and רחמים. But as a person is able to align himself with this and realize that there's no difference between Hashem and אלוקים, there's no difference between דין and רחמים, ואחר כך נשאר בו רשימו, and now when he comes back to himself, he's left with this imprint.

He knows intellectually, not at the same total התבטלות, but he knows intellectually that there's בעצם no difference between דין and רחמים. מאחדות הזאת, from this unified רצון, ואחר כך נעשה בבחינת שוב, אז הרשימו מראה לדעת, this reshimo is shown to his daat and it's left in his in his intellect, שידע שכולו טוב וכולו אחד. וזה שאמר משה לדורו, אתה הראת לדעת כי השם השם הוא האלוקים, הוא האלוקים. That Rashi says that this is where הקדוש, Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave them the Torah, He opened up the שבעה רקיעים that they had this התגלות, that that שם הויה and Elokim is really one.

כי משה הוא בחינת עין, because Moshe was בחינת עין. כתבי יד says Moshe was בחינת דעת. But Moshe was עניו מכל אדם, he was to the extent that we have Moshe was שכינה מדברת מתוך גרונו. Moshe was totally, to the extent of human capacity, was totally hitbatel himself. We said earlier במיתה, מחיים also, so it's בחינה of ratzoh vashov. But Moshe was the ultimate human expression and example of of somebody who is hitbatel to Hakadosh Baruch Hu. ודורו דבוקים אליו, and the דור that was davuk to Moshe as the tzadik, that was davuk in these three ways that we're discussing how a person can do it, both with the התקשרות and a giving tzedakah, however they did it, and also vidui in front of in

front of Moshe, that's how they would attach themselves, like we're saying, ראוי להם לדעת. So they also would hitbatel themselves to the extent to Moshe Rabbeinu, because Moshe Rabbeinu was the צד of דעת, היינו להאיר לדעת בחינת אין סוף, that they were they had this השגה as well, that they also had this understanding of אין סוף, בחינת רעוא דרעווין, like the ultimate, we said, not just that the ratzon, the ratzon of the ratzon, the most innermost ratzon of Hashem, at the at a place where it's before you have this system like we said in a corporation of the of the giving arm and then the budgeting committee and the disciplinary committee.

Before, before, before, everything started off with this ultimate רצון להיטיב לבריאות, בחינת השם הוא האלוקים, where everything is one unified unified idea, that there's no חילוק between them. And this and when a person experiences to whatever degree during this דבקות, but when a person comes back and then they they come back to themselves, so to speak, ratzo v'shov, in their own back into their human capacity and attention, and they're able to have this imprint and intellectually understand, even if it's not the same experience, that everything is one.

And the tzadik experiences the most because he is at the highest level of התבטלות. And on account that a person can be מתקשר himself to the tzadik, they prepare themselves as a כלי to get out of the four negative מדות like we spoke about last week, that's with the first two things that of attaching oneself to a tzadik and giving tzedakah. And then when they say vidui and they're able to separate themselves, they're able to take off the עבירות that were etched in their bones and it forms a new צירוף, and they're able to literally be מבטל themselves towards the tzadik.

And with that, the tzadik we said is is a tzadik in himself, but he's also, the same way that an organism has a brain and a pinky toe, so in the organism of Yisrael, of Klal Yisrael, of כנסת ישראל, of the Jewish people, so the tzadik is, so to speak, that attachment point that brings everything together and brings עבודה together. We said earlier in I think Torah, the second Torah, that even if everybody had their piece in the משכן, that it takes the צדיק הדור, that Moshe Rabbeinu is בחינת being able to assemble the משכן so that it could be מקבל the שפע.

So that's where that's where a person who's נכלל, who who who is מבטל himself to the tzadik is also to become part of this and also elevate מלכות back up to the שורש and live in a בחינה of מעין עולם הבא, where there's no דין and דין and רחמים. It's יוד and therefore we're going to see again, once again how this is the פנימיות of the מאמר חז״ל in בבא בתרא דף ע״ג, where זה פירוש אמר רבה בר בר חנה: זימנא חדא הוה קא אזלינן בספינתא, I was going in a boat.

וחזינא לההוא כוורא, the Rashbam is on the side over here, and I saw a fish, which we actually said, well we'll speak it out in a second, but we saw a fish, דיתבא ליה אכלא טינא באוסיא ומית. There was some sort of a שרץ טמא, some sort of a little bug that was in its, the fish's nostril, and it died, the fish. ואדחוהו מיא, and the water expelled it. ושדיוהו לגודא, and it put him onto the wall or the shore, which is the wall of the ocean.

ואיחרוב מיניה שיתין מחוזי, and it destroyed 60 cities. ואכלו מיניה שיתין מחוזי, and 60 other cities came and ate from it. ומלחו מיניה שיתין מחוזי, and another 60 cities came and salted it, salted the, the meat of the fish. ומלו מחד גלגלא דעיניה תלת מאה גרבי משחא, and we filled from one eye of the fish 300 barrels of oil. וכי הדרינן, and then says רבה בר בר חנה when we came back, לבתר תריסר ירחי שתא, when we came back after 12 months, חזינן דהוה קא מנסרי, we saw that they were sawing, sawing מגרמיה, from its bones, מטלאלתא, planks of wood, והוו למבנינהו להנך מחוזי, to rebuild the cities that were destroyed.

So now we're going to see that all of the thing, the ideas that we've been discussing in this Torah are going to read in as the פנימיות to this מאמר, to this מאמר חז״ל. פירוש: ספינה לשון חשיבות. And again, as we go forward, we're going to see concepts that at first time trying to keep track of them, but we're going to see a thread coming through. We already saw this where on, in תורה א אות ה we said that a different מאמר חז״ל גלא דמטבע לספינתא, we already saw ספינה and over there we said הוא החן והחשיבות.

So we say over here also: פירוש ספינה לשון חשיבות, because in Aramaic ספון is a לשון of חשוב. בחינת מלכות, which is ספינה is a לשון of מלכות, חשיבות שרבה בר בר חנה חקר בשכלו אודות המלכות. Rabba bar bar Chana was coming to evaluate and to be מתבונן and to think about the status of the מלכות, which we've been saying, what's the whole problem when מלכות, what we see over here, that the kingdom should reflect the majesty of the רצון of a מלך. לשון of a Melech, by the way, is nimlach.

There's a difference between a king and a dictator. A Melech is somebody who guides, who advises the people. מלך בלא עם, a person, you know, if they declare themselves the king of the ant farm, it's totally, it's a joke, it's irrelevant. That's why Hakadosh Baruch Hu that He relates to us at all is only chesed from Hakadosh Baruch Hu, when it's a gift to us that we're able to do it. But in any event, we say that, so when the Malchut is not aligned with the רצון ה׳, so that's as if the Shechinah, which is the Malchut, is in גלות, בין הגוים, which is also we started the first Torah with as well.

So Rabba bar bar Chana was going to see what is the status of the Malchut. איך בני ישראל מעלין אותה, how or whether the Yisrael is elevating it from the goyim, like we said earlier in this Torah by אות א. וחזינא להאי כוורא, and he saw this fish. ישראל מכונים בשם דגים, although just to point out that we said earlier in Torah ב אות ח, where we said וחזינא להאי כוורא הוא בחינת צדיק הדור הנקרא דג, זה בחינת משה משיח. So now we see another that every person from Yisrael could be in this בחינה of dag.

כמו שכתוב, over here we will again base it on a pasuk, this is by the ברכת יעקב, וידגו לרב בקרב הארץ, it's by Yosef, but all of Yisrael is really called the זרע of Yosef. But דיתבא ליה אכלא טינא בנחירווהי, there was a sheretz tamei that was in its nose. Now, what's that? בחינת תפילתן של ישראל. Where do we see this that there was some sort of a negative element that was working its way into the tefillah, was with בלבול הדעת? כמו שכתוב: תהלתי אחטם לך. And we already know this because if we look back to Torah ב in אות א, we said כי עיקר כלי זינו של משיח הוא התפילה שהוא בחינת חוטם, כמו שכתוב תהלתי אחטם לך.

So we are already starting to become familiar that this idea of a chotem is a בחינה of tefillah. So he says תהלתי אחטם לך that תהילה is tefillah, which is a bechinah of חוטם like we saw. So this is a reference that this שרץ was in the nose, that means that there was something טמא that was mixed into the person's תפילה, שנתערב שרץ, היינו טומאה, that this negative element, this negative thing was mixed in, תפילתו ועבודתו ובלבל אותו. Now, it is just worth noting, which we said earlier as well, that the person was coming to daven, he was coming to try to do avodah.

The problem is that there was something negative mixed in. Everything that we're discussing, even in terms of the role of the tzaddik, is first predicated—Rabbi Chaim Kramer discusses this in page 165, note 156—he says that that it's first and foremost predicated on the willingness of the Jew, motivated by his attachment to הקדוש ברוך הוא, and he's the one who really has to begin the process of repentance and have this desire for change, and this is what will be the trigger. Although all these other things of attachment to a tzaddik, and so forth, are the vehicle of how he's going to come do that.

So, he is coming forward in tefillah and avodah, now the problem is, how does he get rid of this this טומאה that's mixed in? So, this טומאה is mixed into his tefillah, and in the Biurei HaLikutim, it explains why davka we're we're discussing tefillah, that this is the עבודה זו הנבחרה, this specific thing that is is that we're discussing in the context of deveikut and bitul to ratzon Hashem. Tefillah is avodah shebalev, not just, you know, a person has more kavanah, it doesn't mean he's asking for chocolate cake and then he screams louder about how much he wants.

The idea of tefillah is avodah, that it's התבטלות to הקדוש ברוך הוא. Tefillah is supposed to be an avodah, not just a a screaming louder that you want הקדוש ברוך הוא to do what you want, it's that you're supposed to be bringing yourself closer to הקדוש ברוך הוא. The more that you align your ratzon with ratzon Hashem, so now you're asking הקדוש ברוך הוא, "I want to give you nachat, I want to be the most productive, that's my purpose in life." But your tefillah and your avodah, which over here it says in the in the מפרשים, I'm using again this Rav Attiyah version, which is has very good notes, but he says that that that it's not talking about separate avodah, it's just in line

with tefillah. ובלבל אותו, ולא היה יכול איש הישראלי הזה לעבוד עבודתו תמה, and he was not able to have a עבודה תמה because this התבטלות was prevented from the fact that he had this this external, this this this שרץ טמא as part of his avodah, which is representative of the four We we said started off that a person Last week we discussed that a person, until he gets rid of his negative character, the expressions of his negative character traits, which is עצבות and עצלות, תאווה, דברים בטלים, גאווה, but until he gets rid of those, so then he can't become receptive, he can't have total התבטלות until he gets rid of his own self-serving desires and negative expressions of his character.

So מה עשה איש הזה? What did he do? עשה שלש בחינות הנ״ל, היינו, so he went through the three-step process of teshuvah that we've been discussing is התקשרות לצדיק, which we said is a person who's רואה את הצדיק. But to see something is to appreciate it. If you see a diamond and you think it's glass, then you didn't see the diamond, right? So it's נתינת צדקה to the צדיק ווידוי דברים. And we're going to say how these things are three thing these three ideas are in our מאמר חז״ל.

וזה פירושו, ומית, ואידחו מיא ושדיוה לגודא, that the fish died, that the the the water was not able to be סובל this thing that was that was dead, so it put it onto the wall. והזכיר השלש בחינות, when we go through them, והזכיר השלש בחינות מעילא לתתא. We're actually going to go through the three steps, but we're going to start off with vidui, because we said that מיתה is a reference to the vidui, because whenever beit din put somebody to death, so they say they say vidui first.

The reason that we're starting with vidui is because the truth is is that the ikar of התבטלות and of our attachment to a tzadik, where we're going to come and we're going to fulfill our avodah, it really takes place in the vidui. The first two steps are really a preparation for the vidui, because we have to use them, like we fleshed out last week, to get rid of the negative expressions of our character that are holding us back. So over here, it puts it into reverse order in order to The Parperaot Lachachmah says this, in order to first express the ikar part of the of the teshuvah process and of the avodah.

ומיתה זה בחינת ווידוי דברים, כמו שאמרו, כל המומתין מתוודין, like we just said, that everybody puts death at ווידוי. ואידחו מיא, the water pushed him out, זה בחינת צדקה that he gives to the tzadik, כמו שכתוב: שלח לחמך על פני המים, person throws their bread to the water, וכתיב: אשריכם, fortunate, זורעי על כל מים. And the Rashi says over there: אשריכם ישראל, הצלחה לזריעת צדקתכם כזרעים על מים, that they spread that they plant their tzedakah as though somebody is planting by the water and so forth. But in any event, we see that water is a reference to to tzedakah.

The The Rav Chaim Kramer note says, brings down, that when a person gives charity, gives tzedakah, it seems as though he's throwing his food into the water, something that brings no material benefit, but he says actually it always bears fruit, like somebody who plants grain on a well-watered field and will be confident of a of a good crop. And likewise somebody who gives tzedakah will be assured that his good deeds will bring him prosperity. But in any event, back to where we are, we see that that the fish died, that's a bechinah of vidui.

אידחו מיא is a reference to tzedakah. ושדיו לגודא, and it threw him onto the shore, but onto the wall. A גודא is a wall, a צדיק נקרא גודא. A צדיק is called a wall, לשון גדר שהוא גודר פרצותיהן של ישראל, that he, that the צדיק helps mend the breaches of Yisrael. וזה ושדיו לגודא, that this that it got it threw the fish onto the shore or onto the wall, שהקריב את עצמו לצדיק, that he got closer to the צדיק. So now we have our vidui, our tzedakah, and our hitkashrut to the צדיק.

ועל ידי שלש בחינות אלו וחרב מיניה שיתין מחוזא, through these three things, the person was it said that the city got destroyed. ועל ידי המיתה, היינו וידוי דברים, through the mitah of the of the fish, but it's a reference of the, well, the dag we said is Yisrael, through the וידוי דברים of the Yisrael that wanted to get close to Hakadosh Baruch Hu through Torah and tefillah, but who had this the שרץ טמא in him that he needed to do teshuvah from, העלאת המלכות מבין הסטרא אחרא.

Like we explained earlier, he was able to elevate מלכות. והצדיק הורה לו את הדרך הישר, and the צדיק is able to then show him the דרך הישר in his avodah so לפי his שורש הנשמה to get close to Hakadosh Baruch Hu. כמו שכתוב בהפטרת בראשית, like it says in the haftarah of בראשית, אחריב הרים וגבעות, I will destroy the הרים וגבעות, רמז על חורבן ממשלת העכו״ם. It's a reference to this מלכות that's in the, right, we said that מלכות is in the galut by the goy. So this malchut that that through through ga'avah and so forth, that that's why it's a lashon of har, but that I'm going to destroy the har, it means I'm going to destroy the malchut of the goyim.

By the way, interestingly, the sefer, the Parperot LaChochmah explains why why are we even quoting the haftarah of Bereishit? Why not just quote the pasuk is in Yeshayahu, just quote the pasuk in Nach? Why are we quoting haftarat Bereishit? Because this, like we said, is really what Hakadosh Baruch Hu wants, the avodah. All of this that we're discussing is be'etzem the purpose of why Hakadosh Baruch Hu created the whole the whole gantze ma'aseh Bereishit, so that there should be an adam that's able to engage avodah, and that's why we quote it to ma'aseh Bereishit.

והולכתי עורים בדרך לא ידעו, the the pasuk continues, I will lead the blind ones in a in a derech that they didn't know, is the בחינה שהצדיק הורה לו דרך ישר, that the tzadik is going to show this person the righteous way. By the way, why are they blind? Because a person a person until they know, we we said that the derech to become nichlal in the Ein Sof, the the person doesn't know. The tzadik is being megaleh the way until the person is led, either first of all until the person has this gilui is ratzo vashov, so then they they don't they don't even see it, so to speak, in their mind's eye until they are able to be exposed and then bring back

the reshimu, or also that the tzadik that the the person doesn't understand the way towards this. That's why he has to go and say vidui and have his bitul of himself to the tzadik, so that the tzadik could show him the way. זה בחינת פרשת דרכים, that we said spoke about in ot ח', that the at the crossroads. ושיתין מחוזא, and sixty cities, lashon of shitin is רמז על עלית המלכות. A lashon of sixty is a lashon of elevating מלכות, דכתיב בה ששים המה מלכות, because it says elsewhere, ששים המה מלכות, which, by the way, ראשי תבות, ששים המה מלכות, in the Biurei HaLikutim says a ראשי תבות משה, not in order.

But but we see that since based on a based on a pasuk in שיר השירים, ששים המה מלכות, that Malchut is also associated with the idea of shitin, so the sixty cities is a a reference to elevating Malchut. We'll go back and we'll read the story in the the ma'aseh, the מאמר חז״ל rather, in a streamlined way afterwards. ואכלו מינה שיתין מחוזא. Now, we said so it destroyed sixty cities, it destroyed the Malchut of the goyim, right? And it was able to now be elevated, Malchut was going to be restored to its right place through the through these the through the mitah, through the vidui and התקשרות לצדיק, and the tzedakah.

Not in that order. What happened next? ואכלו מינה שיתין מחוזא. Now sixty cities ate the ate it. What does it mean? רמז על שני מדות רעות של חי ומדבר. This goes back to what we mentioned last week. This is talking about that we aligned really דומם, צומח, חי, חי, ומדבר. We aligned it with the four elements, with earth, fire, water, ruach, right, and with the four middot. But he says this that sixty cities ate it is a remez to the middot of a חי ומדבר, which are דברים בטלים are a idea of chai, and ga'avah is aligned with מדבר, שעל ידו בא עניות, that with these two things, דברים בטלים and ga'avah bring one to aniyut like we saw in אות ח'.

ועל ידי צדקה מסלקן וממשיך שפע, צדקה brings one to ashirut. So this idea that they were eating and that there was a a a a flow of shefa that it brought ashirut, tzedakah is going to be the remedy for these two elements of דברים בטלים, which is and of ga'avah. וזה ואכלו מיניה, and that's why there was hamshachah of shefa, that they were able to eat from it, and they were able to have this benefit. ושיתין מחוזא, and sixty cities, רמז על בחינת ששים גבורים, שמשם that from there ba parnasa, because we say עושר וכבוד, עושר כבוד, בשמאלה עושר וכבוד, so from the left, which if you say chesed and gevurah and it gets very technical, but it's not fluffy at all, it's just very,

very, you know, mathematical, but what we'll come out with is so beautiful that it just relates to everything. If you have chesed, whatever this means in our terms, again, כלפי the ruchniyut there is no right and left, but as far as the משל that we're dealing with, if if gevurah is on the בחינה of being on the left, and בשמאלה עושר וכבוד, so now shishim giborim that is a reference to what's on the שמאל שמשם בא פרנסה. Parnasa also comes בשמאלה עושר וכבוד from the left כמו שאמרו גבורות גשמים, גשם is also parnasa is associated with gevurah, and therefore we see that this is this aligns with tzedakah.

ומלחינן שתין מחוזי, so so far in our process, we have the mitah, we have the vidui, and then we have in a three-step teshuvah process, we said that a person has to a person has to be מקשר with the tzaddik, give tzedakah, and do vidui. So, in reverse order, we spoke about the vidui. Now we spoke about giving the tzedakah, which is going to get be uh prepare one to get rid of two of these middot. ומלחינן שתין מחוזי and the other 60 cities salted the fish, זה רמז על תיקון שתי מדות רעות, דומם, צומח.

דומם we said is aligned with atzvut or atzlut, inanimate matter, and צומח, something that's organic, plant growth, is aligned with תאוה, על ידי קרבות לצדיק, to see him, to appreciate him, to come close כי הצדיק הוא ברית מלח עולם. הצדיק הוא שומר his brit, so which we also spoke about earlier, by Yosef. Excuse me. Then הצדיק who שומר his brit is representative of ברית מלח, cuz a melach is also a brit. So we see that these 60 cities that salted the meat, so this is a bechinah of התקשרות לצדיק, גם עצבות ותאוות באים מדמים עכורים, that also atzvut and ta'avah comes from putrid dam, something mixed and negative in the blood, ועל ידי מלח פולט הדם הרע, and the salt is able to draw out

the negative uh the the the dam that's ra. So already we see these three elements in teshuvah, two of them getting rid of the negative character traits and then the third one, which is able to align oneself to the tzaddik where he can come to a point of his complete hitbatlut and avodah in line with the שורש נשמה. ושתין מחוזי, the 60 cities, זה רמז על ששים אותיות שבברכת כהנים, and the 60 cities is a reference to the letters of ברכת כהנים, שהם ביד צדיק cuz the tzaddik has the capacity to give ברכות כמו שכתוב ברכות לראש צדיק.

So so far, where are we in this maaseh just so that we're in in a general sense we are not lost, that we Rabba bar bar Chana said that we were traveling in a ספינה, which is a reference to understanding what the status of מלכות is, and we saw this in this כוורא, this דג, this Israel who was a bechinah of in the nose he was wanted to daven and have avodah, and there was something that was tamei there, he had these negative middot that had to be rectified so that he could ultimately be has have hitbatlut.

So really, a person has to first work out the tumah and then he can have hitbatlut. But we spoke about them in reverse. So we said that the כוורא, the fish died, meaning he did vidui, and the water uh tossed it around, he gave tzedakah, and it threw him onto the shore, onto the גודא, he got close to the tzaddik, and it destroyed 60 cities, meaning that his vidui was able to מתקן מלכות, and the tzaddik guided him towards his path, and another 60 60 cities then ate from it as a result of having given tzedakah, there was a berachah of abundance of shefa, and this also uh got rid of his ta'avot, his negative character traits of דברים בטלים and ga'avah, which would bring

poverty, so tzedakah gives the עושר. 60 cities salted the meat after seeing the tzadik and getting the brachah, he was able to get rid of the other negative character traits of atzvus and uh and taavah. Good. So now, weiter, ומלו מחד גלגלא דעינא תלת מאה גרבי משחא, and we filled from one eye 300 barrels of oil. גרבי משחא זה בחינת הדעת, that this גרבי משחא, which is a kli for the oil, what did we say is a kli? We said that really a person's daat, his intellect really can't hold the ein sof, it's ratzo vashov, but when a person comes back, there's this reshimu of being able to relate what he had the experience with, that's going to be the kli.

So this is the barrel that held the oil, כי שמן משחת קדש זה בחינת שכל, because שמן משחת קדש is a bechinah of seichel, meaning that שמן is a flow, based on the Zohar, from uh from כתר to the מוחין, okay, from from רצון ה׳ to the next The כתר is, all right, רצון השם, then the מוחין is חכמה, בינה is חכמה, בינה or חכמה, בינה, דעת, okay, depending how we put it. But in any event, we said that שמן is a remez to daat, or, in our purposes, whatever whatever is left over to have this reshimu of what was left over from this exposure.

ותלת מאה זה בחינת משה, 300 is a bechinah of Moshe. Why? Moshe is what? It's a ש' is in a gematria is 300, and מה, Moshe the letters if you pull them out is ש' מה. Moshe is בחינת מה, because מה is is ונחנו מה, that מה is a לשון of what are we, it's a לשון of total anavah. And 300 is a reference, so it's ש' מה, we said Moshe is the עניו מכל אדם, and and therefore we're going to see we're going to see it's ש' מאה.

We're going to see מה is aligned with מאה. So Moshe the way if we realign the letters, we see a פנימיות of it is ש' מאה, שהוא בחינת מה, שהצדיק מקטין את עצמו בבחינת מה. Because really Moshe Rabbeinu is a bechinah of מה because of ונחנו מה that he totally is mitbatel himself לגמרי. What's three? בשלש בחינות צריך להקטין את עצמו, כמו שכתוב אל יתהלל חכם, גיבור, ועשיר. In the three general areas where a person would so to speak have his own עצמיות and his own identity and his own pride, חכם, גיבור, עשיר, in all these ways a tzadik is מקטין himself, he has his bitul, and he has total anavah.

נמצא שבכל בחינה מאלו מאלו שלש בחינות הוא ונעשה מה. He makes himself into an anav. ועל ידי זה, and through this bitul, יש לו to a talmid chacham, to the tzadik who is a bechinah of Moshe, התפשטות התפשטות הגשמיות he's able to shed himself of his own גשמיות. ומדבק באין סוף, and he's able to be to align himself with the אין סוף, שאין שם שום שינוי רצון, where there's no differentiated רצון, אלא ה' הוא אלוקים כנ״ל. That at at the שורש שורש שורש, there is no difference between din and rachamim.

It's all ה' הוא אלוקים. It's not differentiated at all, there's total yichud. היינו כולו הטוב והמטיב, וזה בחינת חד גלגלא דעינא כמובן באידרא. And this is the idea of one eye. ובזמנא דאתי ישתכח בעינא חדא דרחמי, because le'atid lavo there's only going to be one eye, there's only going to be in in technical terms we say that we we spoke about many times the middot and the פרצופין in different ways. Again, we can't go through all of the, nor am I qualified to go through a whole hakdamah, but just for the purpose that we need to get through this, the middot are certain building blocks, and the פרצופין are how they are combined, so to speak, in order that HaKadosh Baruch Hu through using the

building blocks of the middot relates to us. And we said that keter is called Arich, and chokhmah is Abba, and Imma and binah is Imma, and then the next six are going to be ze'ir anpin or za, and then Malchut is nuk. So the so chag"at nehi, chesed, gevurah, tiferet, netzach, hod, yesod is ze'ir anpin. So, we say that the this is the the flow. It's like the the ratzon, the the the planning, and then the execution, right? So, we said that in in these terms we're going to say that the that the za, the ze'ir anpin that we have now has שתי עיניים, it has two eyes, one good and one bad, so to speak, like rachamim and din, le'atid lavo there's only going

to be one eye, okay? So whatever we can do with that, זה בחינת כולו הטוב והמטיב. This is going to be a total bechinah of הטוב והמטיב. Nimtza, and we're going to get back to the me'ah and the mah in a second, נמצא כשהצדיק עושה עצמו מה, when a tzaddik has had his total ביטול, מדבק עצמו לעינא חדא דרחמי, so then he is medabek himself, he aligns himself with the one with with the with the Ein Sof, with the אין סופיות which is כולו רחמים, היינו לאין סוף.

ואחר כך כשחוזר, when he comes back to himself, because he all it's only after death, a person can't stay in that total bitul, otherwise he's not a person, that's not what the avodah is. Even the tzaddik has to come back to here. ואחר כך כשחוזר בבחינת רצוא ושוב, אז ממשיך מאין סוף האחדות, then then he's going to be mamshich what he has left from the reshimu that can be in his daat, this idea, at least this intellectual idea as we understand that there's no difference between rachamim and din.

הרצון הפשוט שם דרך ממשלתו, this רצון הפשוט that he's going to understand through his anavah at where he at when he comes back. ונעשה ממה מאה, because what's the א'? The א' is the I. The א' is, you call it the ego, call it whatever you want. So, when he's his bitul himself, there's מאה, when he's his bitul himself, it's like the א' is out of the picture, and he's totally מה, he's totally has his bitul. And when he comes back, the א' works its way back back in.

And therefore, Moshe is ש' מאה, although when it it's ratzo vashov. So, when the א' comes out of it, and the tzadik is holding, but cycling through, when it's total bitul it's מה, and then the א' goes back in, and it's like מאה. And therefore, ש' מאה, this reference in the מאמר חז״ל of 300 is a reference to Moshe of the tzadik, which is able to pull down this this this idea and this exposure into into the daat, into the שכל, כמו שאמרו, אל תקרי מה אלא מאה.

ונעשה תלת מאה מתלת מה, and okay, we like we spoke out, וממשיך אור הזה, and he's able to be ממשיך this this אור אין סוף, so to speak, לדעתו ולשכלו, at least in the geder of the רשימו, היינו גרבי דמשחא, which is a reference to the oil that's in the barrels, cuz now that he has the keli for it, the he's able to be ממשיך the the the the oil into it, and make his guf into a כלי שהוא בבחינת שכל. And therefore, this is אתה הראית לדעת, like we spoke about earlier, שממשיך אור אין סוף לדעתו, that he's mamshich this the this this idea this אור אין סוף this רצון השם into his own daat, to the extent that he can handle it when

he comes back, so to speak, into himself, cuz רצוא ושוב, שידע אחדות, that intellectually he's holding by an אחדות where there's no difference between din and rachamim, שה' הוא האלקים, ויברך הטוב והמטיב על הכל כמו לעתיד לבוא. And if a person was holding like this, it's as if, I'm not speaking על הלכה, but a person would be able to say הטוב והמטיב on everything, he wouldn't even see he wouldn't even see the bad, right? A person a person who lo aleinu is in a life-threatening thing, and he has to have a painful treatment, he only, that he wasn't going to get, whatever, he only sees הטוב והמטיב, right?

Okay, it's not a good example, okay, it still hurts, whatever. A person who's holding in a certain area where he understands something, he doesn't even see it as a negative. כי הדרן ואזלן לבתר תריסר ירחי שתא, says רבה בר בר חנה, I came back after 12 months, וחזינן דהוו מנסרי מגרמייהו, and we saw that they were sawing from the bones of the this people לבנינא הנך מחוזא to rebuild the cities, כי מאחורי הקדושה, because from the אח of קדושה, so we said that where there's a flow, so to speak, where there's two people that are aligned in their relationship in their point of view, that's called panim b'panim.

You could have panim b'panim, ach b'ach, panim b'ach, ach where a person is aligned, so then you have so to speak the front side. But what if you know, what if I'm singing, but I'm not singing to you? We're not aligned, so you benefit as it were, it's like the other side. In other words, there's even מלכות even מלכות however things manifest, if there was no spiritual flow, they weren't getting anything from Hakadosh Baruch Hu, they wouldn't exist, there would be no not nothing to allow something to exist.

So everything is some sort although but sometimes it's distorted, so you can have the the sitra achra, the other side, so to speak, of מלכות when it's misaligned, Hakadosh Baruch Hu allows it so that that his purpose so to so to speak, if you could say, would ultimately be accomplished, that there should be bechira in the world, but something is getting sustained by the spiritual energy of the אח at that point, כי מאחורי הקדושה, which is which is like it's getting a יניקה from the חיצוניים, so to speak, שהם שנים עשר שבטים.

So כנסת we have כנסת ישראל. כלל ישראל, אורייתא, וקודשא בריך הוא חד הוא. So the expression of כלל ישראל is really in 12 different parts. By us, it's the 12 שבטים. Corresponding to them are the 12 months. As it says in the Tur, my note over here says, at the end of סימן תי״ז, the לשון of the טור, י״ב ראשי חדשים השנה שגם הם נקראים מועדים הם כנגד י״ב שבטים. So the the the encapsulating our expression of קדושה in the world is the י״ב שבטים, is י״ב חודש.

After י״ב חודש, says Rabba bar bar Chana, שעל ידם נתתקן מלכות, that through them there could be a tikkun in the מלכות. However, ואחריהם, the אח of them, that's where it's not accomplishing its purpose, it's not being מתקן the מלכות, the מלכות is not an expression of רצון השם, so הוא הטומאה. That's אלהים אחרים. That's the negative expression, so to speak. It's right, it's yeah. ויש בני אדם שיוצאין מהקדושה, and you see people that are functioning, but they're not in line with with kedusha, they're not in line with מלכות, they're not expressing their life as an expression of רצון השם.

וזה שסיפר התנא, רבה בר בר חנה is really an amora, but sometimes refers to as tana in this sefer, it says, שהדר וחזר לעיין באלו שהם בתר תריסר ירחי שתא, he says you can't leave anybody out to dry, no child is left alone, right, we went to go see the people that were after the 12 months, they were on the אח, the people that weren't in line with עבודה, they weren't doing the right thing, שהם אחרי שנים עשר שבטים דקדושה, that they were on the other side, they weren't they they weren't doing what they were supposed to be doing, they weren't being יונק in the proper way, שיוצאין מכלל ישראל על ידי מעשיהם הרעים, they left Klal Yisrael, they left they were on the אח

of the י״ב שבטים because of their negative מעשים, וחזינן דהוו מנסרי מגרמייהו, and we saw that they were sawing from their bones, היינו על ידי מעשיהם הרעים חקוק על עצמותם, and we said that there's like an impression left by aveirot that's on the bones, it's etched into the bones going back and forth, aveirot back and forth, that look like saw marks, והחקיקה עובר מאבר לאבר כנסירה ממש, like a saw, these negative צירופי אותיות that was on there. Aval, however, we were מתבונן and we looked at them, and we we we saw that really they are also a chelek of Klal Yisrael.

על ידי שאיש הישראלי הנ״ל נתעורר בתשובה על ידי שרץ קטן שבנחיריו, what happened? This person, the original how we started off, is a Yisrael wants to get closer to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, and he realizes that something's holding him back in avodah avodah. So what does he do? He had the שרץ קטן, he was נתעורר to do teshuvah through the three steps, the three-step process that we explained at length, על ידי שהרגיש טומאה קטנה שבנחיריו, so he realized something was holding back in his עבודה תשובה, על ידי תשובתו גורם שגם אלו הרשעים נעשו כסא לקדושה, wow.

And in the Kitzur Likutei Moharan it says that through a person's teshuvah they could be גורם that even רשעים גמורים that are not themselves attached to avodah also will have a positive effect. So when we do teshuvah, we literally have an effect on רשעים whatever they are, it's like amazing. So he says, and for sure a person who's already an oved Hashem, when you do teshuvah you literally bring הקדוש ברוך הוא into the world and you can have hit'orerut on people who are רשעים גמורים that you have nothing to do with, people that are standing on the outside.

And for sure in ovdei Hashem when they when they do teshuvah, it literally affects gantz כלל ישראל. This is amazing. I'd be screaming up and down if it wasn't the fact that I had such a bad cold. So he says, נעשו כסא לקדושה, they become like a the Shechinah could be שורה, והוה לבנינא הנהו מחוזא, it builds back up the cities. From them, these people, these other רשעים that got impacted, they're going to build the cities back up. They're not even the ones that started off having this hit'orerut for the avodah.

The avodah started off with the original Yisrael. However, after 12 months it came back, and you see the other people, these people that were that were on the outside, they also were impacted, שעוזרים גם הם לעובדי השם, when they do teshuvah it impacts also the עובדי השם, שיבנו הנהו מחוזא הנ״ל, that the cities are going to be are going to get built back up, which we said, what are the cities? The the expression of malchut, and that all of this combines to have malchut into one big shlemut, where malchut is going to become elevated and reach back up and be aligned with the shoresh.

So now we have our we had the first, we already summed up the first part of the מאמר חז״ל, where the person was engaged in avodah and he was held back and he did the three steps of teshuvah, so that he could get closer. And then we said that 60 that that that we had we had the 60 cities, after he went through and he did all of his teshuvah, and then from one eye, which in order for we said that a person to complete the three-step process, he does vidui in the tzadik's presence and the tzadik, through his own hitbatlut, brings the the Jew the the other Yid with him, and they're able to be mitbatel into the Ein Sof with there's only one

eye that that that rachamim and din are aligned, and it fills up 300 barrels of oil, because in order to do this, the tzadik is able to be mitbatel himself. Like we said that Moshe Rabbeinu, that this זמן, מאי רצוא ושוב, in order to be able to bring down the Ein Sofiyut, even though it's only with a reshimu, but align themselves into daat, and then after this process, after 12 months, meaning the other Jews who are outside in the ענף קדושה, so they already were also brought to rebuilding and being מתקן מלכות.

And it also, everything is prompted by avodah so that all of Klal Yisrael come together and rebuild. וזה פירש, אנכי ה' אלקיך. And this is the peirush, now back to the pasuk we started off with, אנכי ה' אלקיך, פירש הן ה' הן אלקיך, both the ה' הוי״ה which is רחמים and אלקיך which is אלקים which is דין, תבין שכל זאת אנכי, all of this is from Hakadosh Baruch Hu, all of this is really at its core an expression of Ein Sof. היינו שתקיים בה' אהלל דבר באלקים אהלל דבר, that through ה' and through אלקים I'm able to be אהלל דבר, I'm able to relate to it, it's all הטוב והמטיב, היינו כולו הטוב והמטיב, כנ״ל.

אשר הוצאתיך מארץ מצרים, that how are we able to be zocheh to this, that we see that all of that we live מעין עולם הבא, that we're able to be megaleh to we're able to to to bring a geulah to take the malchus instead of being so to speak in galus to the to the אומות העולם, between the goyim, we're able to we'll see why all of galus is a מצרים is a reference to all of galus, we're able to bring the Shechinah out of galus in מצרים, דאיתא במדרש כי כל הגליות נקראים על שם גלות מצרים מפני שהם מיצרים לישראל, because it's it's צר and narrow and pains ישראל.

So what happens, by doing this, by aligning ourselves with ה' and אלקים, then with the ultimate רצון ה', we're able to bring the malchus out of גלות, שהיינו שעל ידי הצדיק, through a tzaddik who's בחינת אין סוף, it's בחינת אנכי, נתבטל מלכותם וממשלתם של של עכו״ם, the malchus of the גוים is going to be בטל, and the malchus will the way that we have the world as it's reflected and manifest will be a true reflection and a true expression of the רצון of the מלך. That's where you have a malchus, that it's an expression.

Again, if you're the king of the ants, that's nothing, אין מלך בלא עם. What shows that you're a מלך is where everything that you see is an expression of the רצון of the מלך, כי על ידי זה עולים מתוכם מעלות דקדושה כנ״ל. מבית עבדים, and what does it mean מבית עבדים? זה רמז על ביטול המדות רעות של ארבעה יסודות, that these four יסודות, how does that happen? How does a person ultimately come to his hisbatlus? First, he has to get rid of his four negative expressions of character.

So these are called עבדים, המכונים בשם עבדים, because before a person does וידוי, he still has his own his he's not מבטל himself yet, he still has these elements of רע that are mixed into him, so these are called עבדים, כי כל הארבע יסודות הם מתחת גלגל הירח, because the four יסודות: אש, רוח, עפר, מים, which also align דומם, צומח, חי, מדבר, which also reflect themselves in the מידות, all of these are under the revolution, so to speak, of the ירח. והירח מכונה בשם עבד, the ירח is called an עבד, כמבואר Zohar: הנה ישכיל עבדי, דא סיהרא.

So we see a reference that the moon is called an עבד, why? So says says ר' Chaim Kramer brings in the notes from Rav Natan in Torat Natan that that he says that why is the moon, which is malchus, we already spoke in the first Torah that that the that the moon is considered malchus, we compared the שמש and the and the ירח, but over here it says that the לבנה, that the לבנה is called malchus, is called an עבד because it בעצם wants to go back to its source, or at least we spoke last time having a full reflection with like when something is in front of the projector, there's there's something missing in the reflection, totally totally be accomplishing its purpose, and yet,

the way that he brings in the note, it's restrained from doing so, the moon waxes and wanes. When it goes down, there's a פגם over there, it's held back from fulfilling its potential and accomplishing its תכלית where it should be. And we said that as a person is מדבק to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, it's when he's able to to to be מבטל himself totally to his purpose, and when something is held back from doing that, they're an עבד, right? We have true חירות is when a person accomplishes his purpose.

Just an unbelievable mashal I heard from from this guy named Josh Lewis, זכרונו לברכה, he said that told me a Midrash, he said: When is the string of a violin free? When it's lying loose on the table or when it's bound up and free to play music? Something that's able to accomplish its purpose is if something is held back from accomplishing its purpose, we think, "Oh, freedom freedom to do what you want to do," that's עבדות, it's being held back from תכלית. So he said, והירח מכונה בשם עבד, כמבואר בזוהר הנה ישכיל עבדי, דא סיהרא, פירש על ידי צדיק.

So now that a person is able to appreciate and give tzedakah and do vidui to the צדיק, עולה המלכות מן הסטרא אחרא. So now the expression of מלכות is going to be elevated from the סטרא אחרא, ונתבטלין המידות הרעות, and the מידות רעות are going to become בטל, and inside of a person, ועל ידי זה אדם בא לבחינת עולם הבא, and then as a person's מידות are בטל, and he does vidui, and he's בטל to the צדיק, הוא בחינת רצוא ושוב, is going to is able to be מבטל himself to the אין סופיות, even though the avodah is really בעצם רצוא ושוב and back and forth where he brings back this רשימו into the שכל, which is the 300 כלים by Moshe, right?

We're all going back into it. So now a person is able to live though in a in a world of כולו הטוב והמטיב ומעין עולם הבא, because even in his שכל, which is only a רשימו of the real אין סוף, but he's able to relate where everything is at the שורש, לבחינת בה' אהלל דבר, באלוקים אהלל דבר, period. And in conclusion, the last paragraph, Rabbi' Chaim Kramer's note, he says that every just brings down, bringing it home, just such a beautiful thought that we saw as part of this Rabbah bar bar Chanah that everything that happens is really בעצם in accordance with our efforts and our yearning that we have to start off.

Yeah, the שמץ טומאה is there, but we start off coming to tefillah and avodah. And if we believe that these תיקונים are playing taking place even though we don't necessarily see the the progress, but we move forward, then not only does it affect us, it affects the רשעים who don't even have any sort of a שייכות and they're going to have התעוררות. And if it affects a רשע, then certainly, by the way, also it would affect somebody who does want to try, and by any step that we take, it literally affects us and the world and other people, and it brings us back to a state closer to to to the the מלכות coming the שכינה coming out of גלות, and im yirtzeh Hashem', the

גאולה במהרה בימינו. Yashar koach.